Recently our team got back from a really good conference experience. The conference itself wasn’t so great, but some of the things we did before and afterwards helped us to have a good time and take away a few nuggets of wisdom. Here are a few tips to help make your next conference a good one, even if the speakers aren’t stellar:

Have a plan
Every great conference experience starts with a good plan. Spend time beforehand writing out who is going, the schedule (when and where to meet, have meals, etc.), whose driving, how much it’s going to cost, where the money is coming from, and print driving directions there and back. It’s also a good idea to have a couple of night options picked out so you and your team don’t lose time in figuring out something fun to when sessions are done.

Be yourself
At conferences it’s pretty easy to slip into spouting stats to impress. But when we relax, drop the act, and be ourselves is when we start to learn, connect, and have fun. The best conferences I’ve been to are the ones where I’m not “Jeff Mc Clung, Children’s Pastor” but where I’m just Jeff. Peter Bregman did a really great post on How to Attend a Conference as Yourself. Might be worth checking out before your next conference.

Go with friends
Never go to a conference alone. Ever. Always take someone (of the same gender) with you. It could be a key team member, the whole team, or someone you’ve been mentoring. Make sure it’s someone you get along with and who’ll benefit from the material that’s being presented.

Take notes
The last conference my team and I went to was a dud. But I still came away with a page of notes with good stats and a few quality ideas to implement. I got most of the useful content from only one speaker. But that’s OK. At least I got something.Even if most of the speakers stink (and they did) you can still find at least one nugget of useful content if you’re looking for it. Good note taking lets you sift through information well.

Pack light
Don’t take a lot of stuff with you. Most of the time the bare essentials will do. Only take what will fit into one suitcase (preferably that fits comfortably in the overhead compartment of a plan). For me this is pretty easy. I usually just take a backpack. This may be difficult for some but you’ll be glad you did.

Schedule fun
With tools like Yelp.com it’s super easy to find cool stuff to do nearby. Before the conference come up with a few ideas for your group to hang out and have fun after the day’s session. Don’t worry about brainstorming how you’ll apply what you learned (unless everyone’s dying to). Focus on having fun.

Schedule reflection
Set aside some time on your calendar for a few days after you get back to reflect on what you heard and consider how you’ll put it into action. I say a few days because you’ll want to get some rest, catch-up with family, and see what’s piled up while you were gone. Definitely make time within that first week to figure out what you’re going to do with what you learned.

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If a leader is successful it’s because a lot of people want them to be. Nobody can do it alone.

That’s doesn’t mean they’re the most popular or more people like them that don’t like them. Most of the time the opposite is true. But any leader whose lasted over the long haul and has grown their ministry has done so because of three groups of people.

For your ministry or organization to grow to the next level you need backing from these three groups of people:

Your Boss
Every leader has a lid. Sometimes it’s a blind spot they won’t address. Other times it’s a lack of resources or information. Whatever that lid is your boss is a part of it.

You may have a great boss and the lid for you is like the ceiling of a cathedral. Or you work for the real Michael Scott and your lid is about as high as a Play School playhouse for three-year-olds. Whoever it is, if you’re going to thrive (not just survive), you’ve got to have a good relationship with them. You’ve got to be reading off the same page and moving in the same direction together. If that can’t happen then it may be time for you to leave.

Your Team
Batman had Robin, the Lone Ranger had Tonto, and Superman…well, he worked alone, but he had superpowers so he doesn’t really count. If you’ve got super powers you can skip this part. But if you don’t then you’ve got to build a team who compliments your weaknesses. If you’re all strong in the same areas then there’s a lot that’s not going to get done. Building a cohesive leadership team has to be every leader’s #1 priority.

Your Personal Board of Directors
Separate from your team, your personal board of directors are the people you go to when you need advice. Trusted mentors, leaders who are further down the road then you are who you want here. It’s not a formal gathering like the Super Friends (chances are they won’t want to dawn capes and wear their underwear outside their pants; if they do that should be an automatic deal breaker). More of people you can go to when you need advice or problems.

Enlisting support for yourself can feel self-serving and egotistical. It’s not, so long as what you need the support for is to do meaningful work that helps others. When you want that, when you go after that, you’d be surprised just how many people around you will want to help.

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Sometimes our biggest problems need just the smallest change in our perspective.

Last week, as I pulled into the garage from work, I walked into our house using the door that connects our kitchen to the garage. As I came in I heard a pretty loud squeak from the door. Like the kind you hear from a dozen or so mice be decapitated simultaneously, as part of some sort of mass rodent execution initiative enacted by Terminex. It was that bad.

I set my stuff down and went to oil the fire closure attached to the door. We’ve had problems with it before and usually spraying some WD40 on it usually does the trick.

I must have sprayed half the can on that thing and it didn’t do any good. After a while the door looked the Nesquick Bunny had been projectile crying YooHoo flavored tears all over the place. It was a mess.

Being the DIY genius I am not, it took me a while to realize what the problem was (besides taking a fire hose approach to trouble-shooting a squeaking door). The problem wasn’t the fire closure. It was the hinges.

After the Homer-sized “Doh!” stopped ringing in my ears I WD40ed the squeak right out of those hinges and realized. Later this important truth came to light:

A lot of times our problem solving isn’t actually problem solving. It’s more treating the symptoms without addressing what caused the real problem in the first place.

Last year when I tried to lose weight I thought all I had to do was stop eating so much. The problem with that was it didn’t address the issue of WHY I was eating so much. When I realized the why I was able to lose 65lbs and keep it off. How? By addressing the real problem, not just the surface issue.

Go deeper. Ask yourself what need your trying to meet by downing that bag of funyons. Pause and reflect what it is about that one guy at work you just can’t stand and allow yourself to see maybe it’s not him you hate so much as it is what he reminds you about you that you don’t like. Consider that maybe you don’t need a new job to be happy, just something fun to focus on at the one you’ve already got.

The next time you’re having a problem solving a problem make sure you’re addressing the root of the real problem and not the surface of a fake one.

It’s always harder, to be sure. But it is always work it.

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¹ David mustered the men who were with him and appointed over them commanders of thousands and commanders of hundreds. ² David sent out his troops, a third under the command of Joab, a third under Joab’s brother Abishai son of Zeruiah, and a third under Ittai the Gittite. The king told the troops, “I myself will surely march out with you.”

³ But the men said, “You must not go out; if we are forced to flee, they won’t care about us. Even if half of us die, they won’t care; but you are worth ten thousand of us. It would be better now for you to give us support from the city.”

⁴ The king answered, “I will do whatever seems best to you.”

So the king stood beside the gate while all his men marched out in units of hundreds and of thousands. – 2 Samuel 18:1-4 (NIV)

The kind of leaders worth following know when to give advice and when to follow it. They know when to make a decision and when to let someone else make it.

You can’t be good at everything, but you can find lots of skilled people. Together you can do work that matters, the stuff of legend, if you can learn when to lead and when to let THEM lead.

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Meetings don’t have to be boring.

In today’s culture we’ve become brainwashed with the false doctrine that because most meetings are boring then all meetings must be boring.

If you were watching a show on TV or Netflix that’s boring you would never think, “Wow, every episode of this show is absolutely terrible (a sentenced uttered by the tens of people who tuned in to all seven episodes of The Cape)! I guess all TV shows MUST be this bad too.” We would never jump to this kind of conclusion about any other kind of medium, but we do with meetings.

Here’s the truth most of us don’t realize:

A meeting is only as good as the person who is leading it, the people they invite, and the agenda they create.

When we can look at meetings in this light it allows us to see meetings for what they really are:

An opportunity to collaborate with a community of like-minded people to advance a shared vision of what could and should be a reality.

And who wouldn’t want to be a part of that?

Creating these kind of meetings, the kind that matter, the kind that give birth to meaningful action which create positive change don’t have to be complicated. When we strip away the superfluous nonsense every meeting people WANT to attend are pretty simple:

1. A review of your team’s successes
Meetings should be less talking at and more sharing with. If you’ve invited people who are able and willing to contribute significantly to a conversation about the agenda all of you care about then isn’t it only fair (and smart) to let them actually contribute?

Make space in the meeting to share reports of progress made and hope that is being found as each of you works closer to the creation of what all of you care about. Let this kind of start fuel the drive, passion, and direction of the rest of your time together.

2. A reflection on where you are
Good meetings become great ones when the person leading them can tactfully move from the wins to the reality. The truth is if you’re still meeting then the big win, the why behind your meeting hasn’t been accomplished yet. That’s OK. What’s not OK is remaining stuck on the past (good or bad) without taking action on the present.

Acting on the here and now is simply preparing tomorrow in such a way so you don’t need to repair yesterday.

3. A response to what’s coming up
Once you know the reality you’re in you can begin to meticulously prepare for the reality you hope to create. The agenda of the meeting should allow for review and reflection. But at the end of the day it’s your response that will determine the success of your meeting and, ultimately, your team. Craft an agenda that will help everyone continue on course.

Meetings that matter are simple but not easy. They need you to put more work on the front and back ends then you probably will in the middle actually living them.

It’s your preparation that will create the backdrop of your meeting, where you and your team will draw the roadmap that will take you where the world needs you to be. And when you get there you will see how all the planning and meeting came together and why it was worth it. And you’ll want to do it all again.

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