I hate 3D glasses.

Not dislike. Not “don’t care for them too much.” Not “could take them or leave them.”

No, I HATE 3D glasses.

Wanna know why?

If your answer is “No” then I probably lost you at “I hate 3D glasses” and you have probably already stopped reading.

If your answer to that questions is “Yes” or even a mildly interested, “Sure, I’ll give you a couple of more lines to explain yourself before I skip to the stuff in bold, unsubscribe to your blog, or go to WordsWithFriendsCheat.com to try to salvage my latest game,” then I thank you.

The reason is pretty simple: My eyelashes are too long. Whenever I put on a pair of 3D glasses my eyelashes bat against them like those giant, old raggedy towels at the Chevron car wash. You probably can’t tell to look at me but I have the eyelashes of L’Oreal supermodel. They look like this, but whenever I wear glasses they feel like this.

It’s a perfect storm when you think about it: Long Eyelashes + 3D Glasses That Need To Be Close + Guy Who Gets Easily Annoyed = Movie Going Disaster.

All of these three components need to work together in harmony, much like the Umpa Lompas in Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory, to get the best results. And in order to build a More-Than-Babysitting Kidmin Image with the other staffers at your church you need to do the same thing too.

Here are the 3 elements every Children’s Ministry needs to have so everyone on staff can catch the vision for what they really are:

1. Display stories of life-change
God is working in your Kids’ Ministry. I don’t need to know much about you to know that. But does the rest of your church staff know? When was the last time you emailed to let them know about a kid who accepted Christ on the weekend? When was the last time you shared in staff meeting how God brought a family back from the brink? When was the last time you put together a video montage kids getting baptized in the last year (this one is harder to do but powerful)? If you staff’s not hearing it from you, they’re not going to hear it from everyone. Give them some stories about your Children’s Ministry that are worth spreading.

2. Do for them what you wish they would do for you
A lot of Kidmins do #1 OK. It’s this one that most tend to struggle with. Think about the things you wish other staffers would do for you. Maybe it’s cleaning up after themselves. Or offering to help out at VBS. Or maybe it’s helping you to figure something out on the computer that’s got you stumped. Whatever it is you wish they’d do for you, do that for them. When you know someone is going to use your space after you, make it look better than you found it. If you know of a big event that a fellow staffer is trying to put together, offer to help. If you see someone struggling with something on the computer that you know how to do, take time to help them do it. Paul said it this way:

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” – Galatians 6:9-10 (NIV)

3. Dish out thanks for what they do do (some pun intended)
We’re good at asking for help, but we’re not so good at thanking people for it (and we wonder why they don’t offer more). Even if it’s something small, go out of your way to give a genuine thank you to them. The more someone goes out of their way to help you, the more you should go out of your way to thank them both publicly and privately. Gratitude increases the chances that they’ll have a positive attitude about helping you out again in the future.

3D glasses are not cool. Never have been. Never will be. But taking these 3Ds into your church may be one of the most powerful things you every do for your Children’s Ministry.

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Last week I talked about the first five commitments of a kidmin that’s more than babysitting. I got a lot of positive feedback about them (at the risk of tooting my own horn, which is difficult, especially since my car is currently in the shop).

So it seemed only fitting to wrap up the series with the second half. Otherwise it would just be the “5 Commitments of a Kidmin That’s More Than Babysitting” and that just doesn’t have as much pizazz as 10, don’t you think?

So here they are:

6. Align with adults
If your adults have a killer weekend service targeted to seekers, make sure your kidmin weekend service is awesome for those seekers kids. If your adults are in small groups, plug your kids into small groups with other kids. If your adults can volunteer for a ministry, create opportunities for your kids to serve. This shows that you’re a team player, which senior pastors love. It also gets everyone at your church on the same page. And it shows your Kidmin is ready to be taken seriously in the life of the church.

7. Do more than just the weekend
If all you do is the weekend it really makes sense that people would only consider your Kids’ Ministry as just babysitting. Provide outreach opportunities as entry-point events for kids to bring their Not-Yet-Christian friends to church. Develop yearly programs that kids and parents can attend and serve at together. Establish discipleship-oriented classes to teach kids how to use their Bible. Don’t let kids grow up thinking that church is just that thing they sometimes do on the weekend.

Click here for 8 tips to help plan your Kidmin calendar.

8. Have margin in your calendar
As important as it is to do more than just the weekend, don’t go overboard. It’s better to do a few things really well then a lot of things badly. Remember your Kidmin Calendar affects more than simply you and the kids. It implicates their parents by default because they’re the ones who have to act as chauffeur and broker for everything their kids do. Going light on the extracurriculars will ensure happy parents, who actually WANT to bring their kids to your stuff.

9. Over communicate
Had a kid accept Christ? Brag about it at your next team meeting. Had a record attendance last weekend? Email the staff to share how God is growing the Children’s Ministry. Have a volunteer who went above and beyond? Point them out at your next volunteer gathering and spotlight them to your senior pastor. Good things are happening in your Kidmin. Don’t be shy about letting people know it.

10. Are sometimes about babysitting
Let’s be honest about this one. Sometimes we do provide babysitting services, and that’s OK. Maybe it’s watching the kids for your worship team’s practice each week. Or watching parents kids so they can attend their recovery group or ministry team meeting. It may even mean watching the senior pastor’s kids so he can make hospital visits. There’s nothing wrong with being “just” babysitting here. We’re enabling the church to succeed with the work of the gospel. And that is always more than babysitting.

What would you add or change about these 10 commitments?

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As a Kidmin Leader of 15 years I cringe whenever someone refers to Children’s Ministry as childcare in much the same way most people cringe whenever chalk is dragged along the chalkboard, when your finger slams agains a door, or whenever MTV announces another season of Jersey Shore. It’s just how I’m wired-up.

But sometimes I think we bring it on ourselves.

How we run our Children’s Ministries shapes people’s perceptions of them. If there’s nothing to suggest there’s more than just dropping kids off and picking them up, why should people think we’re more than just babysitting?

If you’re reading this you know better (or are a really caring family member or friend whose trying to boast my blog stats, in which case I thank you. Remind me to take you out to lunch). But how do we change the babysitting perception that causes people to check-out of what God’s called us to do?

I’m glad you asked.

Over the years I’ve observed lots of Children’s Ministries. The ones that are really serious about growing God’s Kingdom by ministering to kids, the ones that aren’t messing around, the ones that are more than babysitting all make these 10 commitments:

1. Never beg for help
Failing to make this commitment is the number 1 mistake I see Kids’ Ministries make. To be fair, I get why most don’t really commit here. There’s lots of needs and not a lot of workers. That’s fair. I’ve been there. We all have. But begging never really got any of us anywhere long-term, has it? If we’re honest we all know this to be true. What begging REALLY does is give others the impression we’re captaining the Titanic and need people to plug holes. Nobody wants to do that.

2. Cater to guys
Let’s be upfront about this one: Children’s Ministry is predominetly filled with women. Nothing wrong with that. The problem, though, is when everything from the fonts on flyers to the color of the volunteer shirts (and everything in between) is picked soley with ladies in mind. At most churches it’s hard to distinguish between the Children’s Ministry and the Women’s Ministry. No straight guy wants to be a part of that. If you want to get more guys on your team (and I’ve yet to meet a Kidmin that didn’t) then you’ve got to look at everything you do from a guy’s point of view (3D glasses can help with this).

3. Have a process made of programs, not programs that make the process
Most Children’s Ministries are know for their VBS and Halloween Programs. There’s nothing inherently wrong with these kinds of programs. The tension comes in when the ministry revolves around supporting these programs (sacred cows) rather than the programs working to support the vision of the ministry. If you’re main reason for holding on to one of these sacred cows is “We’ve always done it that way!” Then you’ve got a problem. Isaiah 8:11 (NLT) says, “The LORD has given me a strong warning not to think like everyone else does.” It may be time to hold a BBQ at your church for some of these sacred cows.

4. Program for more than just kids
Having a Children’s Ministry that’s more than babysitting is about the kids. It’s also about more than only kids too. You need to have a plan for how you’re going to engage and add value to parents. Click here for 7 practical ways you can start doing this.

5. Have leaders who know when to say no
This goes hand in hand with #3. We can’t be everything to everyone. We need to have clear boundaries that stem from our purpose and vision. We need to say no to lots of good things to say yes to the few great things that are in our wheel house. Bottom Line: You can’t make everyone happy, so stop trying.

I’ll cover the other 5 next week. In the meantime I’d love to hear from you. What would you add or change about this list?

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